By Chris Hernandez
Ladies, are you looking for a man who quotes “Romeo and Juliet,” would not want to live on this world without you and writes you lullabies? How about a man who can offer you friendship, leave his family to be with you and tell you he is your “personal sun”?
If you answered yes, you are not alone. There are 266,992 people on Facebook that are looking for the same men.
The problem: these men are characters in a book.
The phenomenon of Twilight
The book I am referring to is “Twilight;” the men I am referring to are Edward Cullen and Jacob Black.
Now, for those who have no clue what I am talking about, “Twilight” is a tetralogy about a mortal girl named Bella who falls in love with an immortal vampire named Edward who refuses to drink Bella’s blood because she makes him feel alive again.
I know what you’re thinking: yes, it’s all very touching. Nothing says “love” more.
Throughout the books, they face opposition from the world around them as well as their innermost feelings of wanting to be together but not being able. (I guess the whole undead thing is an issue.)
Jacob Black is a werewolf, so he is raised to hunt vampires. Jacob is also Bella’s friend who wants to be more than friends.
Thus, the Bella, Edward and Jacob love triangle is formed and played out in the last three books of the series.
Since its release, “Twilight” has become a phenomenon spawning movies, cruises, conventions and “Twilight” tribute bands.
The movies and books have created quite a buzz on the internet.
Loving a fictional character
Edwardcullenobsessed.blogspot.com is written by Kasey Cullen, who celebrated her lover’s turning 107 on June 20, 2008.
The Facebook group “Edward Cullen Owns My Soul” currently has 20,363 members.
Fanfiction.net has 107,942 entries based on the book, and mothers from across the country are logging on to http://www.twilightmoms.com for the latest scoop on the “Twilight” stars.
Facebook has another “Twilight” group called “Because of Edward Cullen, human boys have lost their charm.”
Before the movie, the group consisted of 101,457 members and has grown to 266,992.
Under the group description, you will be able to find the words, “Thank you Stephanie Meyer, now I’ll never find a man.”
So the question arises: Why have women become so obsessed with these fictional characters to the extent of creating groups where they give up all hope on “real” men to pursue fantasy lives with vampires and werewolves?
Here’s the thing: I feel humans have a tendency to idealize.
We have an idea of what we want, and if we can’t find something to match that idea, we continue to search or just stop searching.
In the case of “Twilight,” the ideal man is not one who is pasty, glistens in the sunlight or is extremely hairy. “Twilight” idealism goes beyond the surface.
In the minds of these girls, these men have no flaws. They are protective, good looking and dedicated to the purpose of pursuing their love with their whole hearts.
The Bella character is interesting. It almost feels like she is stuck between two men willing to risk eternal heartache and solid relationships to be with her.
But this begs the question: What does Bella have to offer them?
I get the feeling that the relationships in “Twilight” are very one-sided.
Yeah, she offers to become undead, but isn’t that the cool thing to be in the “Twilight” world? Are we putting this idea into the minds of young women, hoping that they will conform to expectations?
In a way, I feel all humans want to be in unilateral relationships.
Wouldn’t it be nice to put all the relationship work on one person without having arguments or intense conversations? Wouldn’t that be ideal? When we put the relationship work on the other person, then we don’t have to constantly be on our toes to please them.
Unfortunately, the real world is nothing like that. Relationships are bilateral; we need to work on them to reach mutual compromises.
Twilight idealists want zap moments. They want love to be constant and never waver.
I am pro-wavering love. Bilateral relationships allow people to grow with each other. If love is the only part of a relationship, a person can’t perpetrate the inner walls of intimacy.
Through struggle and allowing ourselves to fall apart with someone, we create unspeakable bonds.
William Shakespeare once wrote, “And yet, by heaven, I think my love as rare as any she belied with false compare.”
There are 266,962 people waiting for the same love. Ladies, are you looking for the ideal love shared by thousands?
Instead, how about a rare love built for two?